Thomas White
“Excellence is not a singular act, but a habit. You are what you repeatedly do.” - Shaqullie O’Neal
What are practicing today to attain excellence?
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Wisdom for the Day - December 1, 2008
Posted on December 1, 2008 by Thomas White
“Safety is our top priority” an exploration of truth and accountability
Posted on December 1, 2008 by Thomas White
There has been a strong response to the trampling death of Jdimytai Damour at the the Green Acres Mall Wal-Mart in Valley Stream, New York. People have wondered, “how could this happen?” or have expressed horror that such a feeding frenzy mentality could exist. I will explore several aspects of an important question this incident brings up. Who is responsible for this man’s death?
The first reflection in this series of exploration starts with the accountability of Wal-Mart. As I was reading a story in the New York Times of November 26th titled Wal-Mart Employee Trampled to Death I was struck by the reporting of a statement issued by Wal-Mart’s corporate headquarters. It stated that, “The safety and security of our customers and associates is our top priority.”
I began to ponder what this meant. For if this is the case, there surely are some criteria that the company has developed that must be met to fulfill this top priority. There also must be some measurements that tell the management of the company how they’re doing with regard to the safety and security of the customers and associates. Finally, I wonder what tie there is to the compensation of the top executives for such a top priority?
As you can see, I have a lot of questions. Today is Sunday and I can’t find anyone to give me those answers. Indeed, finding the answers may take some time. Whatever the distance we must travel to find the truth here, we are off on that journey.
You can expect to find here and through our radio programs a full airing of the accountability of Wal-Mart as an organization for this incident.
This whole situation also raises fundamental questions about the underlying conditions that create such a primal incident. As we further explore the manslaughter of Jdimytai Damour, we will answer the questions of personal, community and corporate responsibility that must be addressed. For if we do not address them and open ourselves to honestly engaging the full range of accountability, how can we say we have a safe, civil society of human beings?
Until Later,
Thomas
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What do you trust?
Posted on November 26, 2008 by Thomas White
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I cant’ remember a time when there was such uncertainty. Uncertainty is a condition brought on by not knowing what to trust. We can see this uncertainty everywhere. The banks didn’t trust each other so they stopped loaning money. Companies did’t trust the future of their business so they reduced jobs. People did’t trust their personal financial security so they reduced spending.
All this uncertainty seems to come from not knowing where to look for the answer to the question, “What now?”. In the past, I have looked to numerous places for the answer to that question. As a child, I looked to my parents. As a student, I looked to my teachers. As a writer, I looked to other writers who I felt were successful.
As you can see, all my references points were other people. This list continues when I want to know what is happening in the world. I may look to news sources or Bloggers. I might listen to people I think should know. Again, I am looking outside myself for the answer to “What now?”.
What I have found is that this approach is unreliable. Why, a few simple truths. Each moment is unique. It is different from every other moment. So if moment is unique then the future can never be a replication of the past. Yet, we have this desire to want a guide. We simply don’t like the unknown. It just makes us crazy.
Another thing. No one can be certain what is right for me, except me. I can’t find my answers somewhere else. If I want to know, “What now?”, why not find that answer inside. I know I have been afraid of trusting myself. Trusting that I will know the answer to “What now?”.
What is the fear? It is the fear of, “what if I am wrong.” Then I will be responsible for what happens to me. Wouldn’t it be nice to just let those I look to for the answer hold the accountability for the outcome of my life? We all know that the only real answer to that question is, “No”.
So what do I do? I make believe that I am certain when I are not. I let this notion of certainty guide me and then I am surprised when things don’t turn out like I expected. Yet, I seldom stop long enough to understand what’s going on.
Well, I spend some time over the past few days pondering this. Taking some time out to understand why I didn’t trust myself and what I choose to do now. In a past Blog, titled, Ring or Clunk, I talked about this simple approach that my wife showed me to find out whether something feels right or not.
Here’s how this applies to the question, “What now?” I ask that question and then sit quietly and listen. There are two things that I might hear. I might hear “the voice”. “The voice” are those familiar words that I hear in times of uncertainty. You all know what I am talking about. In my case, it has two faces. One is a soothing conversation that all is well and I need not worry about a thing. The only problem with this “voice” is that it is filled with arrogance. It is that part of my personality that wants to be “right”. Feeling that if I am right then I will be thought of by others as important. The other voice is pretty much the opposite. It is full of worry. It says things like, “you can’t do that” or “you know, you might be making a mistake”.
Both of these “voices” can be very persuasive. So how do I know that they are false? I remember that I can feel the “truth” of the “voice”. How do I do that? I consult that ability we all have that is often called intuition (or the knowing). It is intuition that confirms whether what I am hearing is ringing or clunking. When the “voice” is talking, its always clunking.
If I ask the question, “is this ringing or clunking” and I am unclear of the answer, the best thing is to not act on the voice. I wait until I have a clear sense.
If what I am hearing is coming from “the knowing” it will ring and then I am clear of the answer to the question, “What now?” Pretty simple and I promise you it is a more reliable approach to the road ahead than anything else I have experienced.Let me know if you give this a try what happens.
With love,
Thomas
Technorati Tags: courage, Deliberateness, Determination, dotherightthing, Intuition, Knowing, leadership, Wisdom
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What is the impact of my buying?
Posted on November 24, 2008 by Thomas White
I was walking through the isles of the toy section of a local farm and hardware store with my wife. We tend to support local businesses wherever we can. So we had made a special trip to this store to get a few winter items for the kids.
Since Christmas is just a month or so away, the store was filled with all sorts of things that children would like. Our 3 year old was drawn to the toy truck/tractor section. As he was being mesmerized by the blinking, talking, action-oriented vehicles, we were looking at the traditional toys that we know from our past. You know things like John Deere tractors and Tonka trucks. In the case of Tonka, the wonderful metal toys they used to offer were not to be seen. Our disappointment almost turned to despair when we realized that most of the John Deere tractors were manufactured in the People’s Republic of China.
We got to talking about the nature of the toys that are available to our children. So much is made inexpensively and oriented to noise and action. We wondered two things. The first is what is the consequence for our children in terms of the activation of their imagination. Our son, was fascinated with toys that had buttons and made sounds. How does this support his play? Aren’t these toys he was playing with a bit like training him to be an effective robot pushing the right button when the right stimulus appears?
The second and probably more troubling concern is a complete disconnection between our children and the people who made the toys. Over 95% of the toys in this store were “Made in China”. They are made to meet a desire to have cheap toys that are flashy and entertaining. Little or no concern on a number of concerns starting with the toys true educational value.
This trend is pervasive in our culture. How many children (or adults) have a sense of what is involved in producing what we buy? How many of us know the impact on our long-term economic viability, the cost to the environment or the effect on our children of our buying choices of everything from toys to food to clothing to entertainment?
I know there are plenty of times I buy without a thought to these questions. Who is thinking about them? For the most part, not those who provide the good and services I buy. It is my responsibility. So when I buy anything, I MUST remember what is important to me before I buy anything. I ask myself how will this purchase supports those values and what is the impact of this purchase. If I am satisfied with my answers, great, then I go ahead and buy. If not, well, maybe I should practice a bit of restraint.
Your thoughts?
Until later,
Thomas
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Remember I chose this
Posted on November 22, 2008 by Thomas White
As I was being “tortured” by a unstoppable crying fit of our three-year old, I was thinking (that can really be a problem). I was thinking of how things might have been different. Here I am, 59 years old, and I having to deal with this kind of situation. Just as I was about to go further into this trail of thought, I recognized what was happening. I was allowing myself to forget my choices.
When my wife and I were considering whether we wanted to have children (we each had two children by previous marriages), we were very deliberate. We felt that we were called to be parents together. For myself, I knew that I wanted to learn again what it was to be a parent (when my older children were growing up, I was busy with my career and work was a greater priority than family). I also knew I would learn so much about myself and being human from witnessing these beings as they developed.
I knew when we made this choice that there would be days when it would be easy and days when it would seem challenging. That was a small price to pay for the amazing reward I would receive. As I was remembering my choice, I once again felt the joy of being with my son. I appreciated how it must feel for him when his world seems out of control. I could identity with the desire to just cry.
As I started to write this Blog, I recognized the applicability of this lesson to so much of my life and the lives of the leaders I work with. How often, when things aren’t going the way that I would like, do I turn grumpy and lash out at other people? It is then that I forget the choice that I made to be a leader. I knew when I made that choice the kinds of days I would have and the challenges I would find.
Perhaps the most important experience I could never have when I am not remembering my choices is the feeling of gratitude. Sit for a moment and remember someone who has made a great contribution to your life. When you have a clear picture of them, feel your appreciation of them for whatever they have given you. As this feeling expands silently thank them for their gifts to you.
I find that when I remember this simple exercise at the end of the day, my sleep is much sounder and I wake up feeling rather cheery.
Until later,
Thomas
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Living in a bubble?
Posted on November 17, 2008 by Thomas White
A few months ago I was reading an article in the The Atlantic titled, Infectious Exuberance. The article is about the factors that led to the meltdown in the housing market. What caught my attention was the way the author spoke about mood. As a student of cultures, I see the strong dynamic that mood plays for whatever culture I may be a member of. It could be the community where I live, the church I attend or the company where I work.
Robert Shiller, pointed out that the underlying factor that is always present in similar situations of a boom is contagious optimism. When we had the Internet bubble bust in 2001, we could track the contagious optimism that guided the decisions of investors who felt that the market was going to continue to rise indefinitely. This same enthusiasm was at play when we felt that housing prices that had been rising rapidly in many areas would continue to do so.
When history is considered, it would show us that in a world of capitalism there has always been rise and fall. This rise and fall is predictable and absolute. So what is it that keeps us from seeing the inevitable when we are in what Shiller calls a bubble? He points out that these bubble are social phenomena. Going further, I feel they are a collective mindset that has a simple story attached to it, “you can get rich without creating anything of value yourself.”
This mindset is so intoxicating that you can only see a reality that supports the mindset. Those that are not infected by the mindset see the world much differently. The know about expansion and contraction and watch diligently for the inevitable change. I mention this to you because this same phenomena of bubbles can be at play in every aspect of our lives.
Now we are on the other side of the economic bubble, the bust part. It isn’t really much different than the boom. In the bust phase, we believe things will continue to get worse. This pessimism continues and, just like the boom phase, it’s a self fulfilling prophecy until it runs out of steam. Then the next boom cycle will begin.
There are some who say we are in such a down swing that the next up cycle won’t happen for six or seven years. I don’t know. What I do know is that we are in a time of adjustment. This boom thinking has run its course. This time around there are different characteristics than in previous busts. For example, for the most part everyone is affected no matter where they live. We have build a very interdependent social and economic system. In past bust cycles, the impact was felt in multiple places, but not everywhere. This is why it is difficult to predict when something will change to move out of the bust cycle and what the change will look like.
I am very curious to watch this cycle to see where it leads. What about you?
Until later,
Thomas
Technorati Tags: Awareness, Deliberateness, simplicity, Truth, Wisdom
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The Excitement of Learning
Posted on November 16, 2008 by Thomas White
Yesterday was the day that our youngest boy really decided to walk. It’s always thrilling for parents to watch their children move into a new stage of life. This experience was particularly compelling as you will see.
With all my children, I find that I learn so much about myself by watching them develop. Now normally Gabriel goes to sleep around 8 o’clock. Tonight things were really different. He was having such a great time actually moving around on two legs rather than “all four” that he was “on fire”. He would begin walking and continue until he wavered and dropped to the floor. In his excitement, he didn’t want to stop practicing his newly acquired skill. He was so excited that it was almost 10:30 before he finally, in total exhaustion, allowed himself to sleep.
I was wondering how long ago I lost that joy of learning? I could feel that he was both pleased with himself and enjoying the freedom of moving around in a new way. When do I feel the freedom of letting go of the limitations that come from living with the way things are and embrace what is truly possible?
Each time Gabriel fell to the ground, he was undaunted. When did I lose the true nature of learning where I didn’t care about how I looked as I tried something new. When did I become concerned about falling down or making mistakes? When was the last time when, like Gabriel, I just engaged learning for the joy that it is.
What a privilege to witness this wonderful being. I know, if I remember the joy I witnessed in Gabriel and forget about doing things perfectly, I too will experience feeling fully alive.
What about you. What is your experience when you learn?
Until later,
Thomas
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Get out of my way!
Posted on November 15, 2008 by Thomas White
I was looking out the window of the rental car bus as we were coming into first stop at the American Airlines terminal at San Jose International. As the bus slowed, I watched a man who was sitting down the bench from me jump up and start towards where the luggage was stored.. When the bus came to a stop, he stepped on the foot of the man across from me and then pushed aside a woman who was standing in front of his luggage.
I looked at this man’s face and realized that he didn’t have any idea of the physical harm he was causing. His eyes were focused and his jaw was set. This got me to thinking about all the times that I have an agenda and simply don’t have any idea of the impact my actions have on all those around me.
I can make up a great story about how important what I am doing is but the real truth is that I am just like this guy getting his luggage. I don’t care about anyone else. I can understand why my wife will complain in her gentle way that sometimes maybe I am not paying attention. There are so many examples of where I am distracted and lose touch with what I am doing and who I am affecting.
So I am grateful to the guy who pushed his way to get his luggage today and I am resolved to contain judgments of people who seem to be mindlessly walking through life and cause me and others some inconvenience.
Until later,
Thomas
Technorati Tags: Awareness, Deliberateness, Wisdom
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A lesson in deliberateness
Posted on November 13, 2008 by Thomas White
On Wednesday, as I was writing for this blog, I searched the web for references to “The Human Element”. In the Google search, I found a link to a Youtube video. I clinked on it and was transferred to a video that showed beautiful imagery and uplifting music. As I watched the video I felt comforted. Without any deliberateness, I included a link for this video at the end of the blog I was writing.
As is my practice, I asked my wife to read the blog. As she was doing so, I saw here attention sharpen and wondered what she was sensing. As she completed her visit to the blog, she looked at me and asked, “do you know who created that video?” I replied, “No.” “Well” she said, “it was produced by Dow Chemical”. She is a musician and as she was listening to the music, she had the “feeling” that there was something that was being sold by the video.
Indeed as I listened to it again, I could hear what she was feeling. They had produced a very subtle piece that had two messages. The first is that human beings are just like chemical elements. This simplification has a clear purpose when you are chemical company. The other message I found was that we the people bend the elements to serve us. There was no connection to the animate world of living things or our responsibility when we use this power.
I won’t speculate on their motives. What I can say is that once I saw the inner messages and knew they were not what I believe in, I deleted the link to the video and this lesson lingers. I can see how often I take things at face value. I let an emotional reaction guide my choice without checking in with my “whole” self to see how what I am engaging “feels”. This sets up a situation where I either make choices that I have to revise when I realize that they don’t fit with my values (like Wedensday) or more troubling, when I never see the real impact of that choice.
Well, it was a wake up call I am heeding and I am deeply grateful to my wife for her wisdom.
Until later,
Thomas
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Bringing back our humanity
Posted on November 12, 2008 by Thomas White
“Our most basic common link is that we all inhabit this small planet. We all breathe the same air. We all cherish our children’s future. And we are all mortal.” -
John Fitzgerald Kennedy
This morning I was reading a CNN interview with President George W. Bush. The focus of the interview was regrets President Bush had during his presidency. He mostly focused on things he said that he wished he hadn’t said. It isn’t often that I read reflective comments from the current President and I found that refreshing. What interested me more, though, was the very human nature of his reminiscence.
Not only was the President speaking candidly, he brought into the interview some personal observations of the president-elect. He spoke of the great concern Senator Obama has for how his daughters will live at the White House. President Bush spoke of his admiration of president-elect Obama’s commitment to be a good father and bring a family atmosphere to the residence he has inhabited for the past almost eight years.
President Bush also said that he called former President Clinton and sought his advice on how to be gracious in the transition with president-elect Obama. He said that President Clinton had been gracious to him and he hoped he could do as well with President Obama.
What a refreshing tone after all the rhetoric of the campaigns and divisiveness of policy differences - human beings seeing the humanity of others. When we look at each other and step outside of our differences we can see how we are more alike than different. We can remember that it is our humanity that can bring us together and solve any challenges we have. When we forget this strife escalates and we all lose.
Until later,
Thomas
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